Questions of the Day

I recently learned that animatronic singer simulator Taylor Swift has a specific dating MO.  First she gets all obsessed about a guy.  Then she gets really, really clingy.  Then she dumps him out of the blue.  Then she writes chirpy country-pop songs about how he's the worst person ever.

Then, approximately 6 months to 1 year later, I'm subjected to those songs over the PA at the grocery store while I'm trying to purchase dishwasher detergent.[1]  Yes, I'm a fortunate soul who almost never has to hear Taylor Swift, but that's beside the point.  Anyway, I have several questions:

1.  This information made me feel slightly bad for a Jonas brother for about twelve seconds.  Has anyone in the history of ever felt bad for a Jonas brother aside from that brief moment?

2.  Knowin this, why the fuck would anyone date Taylor Swift?

3.  If anyone really, really wanted to date Taylor Swift, would anyone notice if they just got a RealDoll modeled after Taylor Swift and put an mp3 player in its head?

4.  Is it really healthy to give teenagers (and, um, I don't know how old Taylor Swift is, but I know she was, like, 16 when she had her first big break) a public platform upon which to do all the stupid shit that teenagers are prone to do?  I mean, it's one thing if she was your standard high school/college girl doing the standard dumbass dating cycle, but now she's got legions of adoring fans and makes a crapload of money running through this cycle.  That seems like the worst possible kind of enabling.

5.  Most importantly, now that I know this, how do I get back to a point where I don't know this?

-------------------

[1]I own a dishwasher.  Ask me about how that's working out one of these days.

Comments

[formerconservative]

I wouldn't know a Taylor Swift song if I heard one.

[Big A]

in response to 4: according to her wikipedia page, Taylor Swift is now at the ripe old age of 22. Considering she's already written about a half-dozen songs reflecting on the naievete of her younger years, by the time she's 30 she ought to have produced more wistful ballads reflecting on her own misbegotten adolescence than Bob Dylan has produced in his entire lifetime.

in response to the general topic: while the modern state of "Country music" has been drastically mainstreamed in the past decade or so, Taylor Swift's garbage has so thoroughly gone the way of Transplanted Valleygirl Bubblegum Pop (sometimes referred to as Miley Cyrus Territory, or MCT for short) that she no longer commands even an ounce of her originally tiny Country cred.
It's sort of like what happened to the Black Eyed Peas and their standing in hip-hop. And by "sort of like" I mean, exactly like that.

Normally I wouldn't care about any of this, but I quickly recognized when she first came on the scene just how effective a barometer of the ever-burgeoning stupidity of the average American music consumer Taylor Swift was, and the fact that her increasingly unbounded stupidity has been rewarded ever increasing cash and fame makes me think... yeah, maybe if we're lucky the world *IS* ending in December. If it means I never have to hear another Taylor Swift song, it just might be worth it.